nawaitu yg salah...

it started on sun... as usual, the assembly... right when she told that PPD will be coming, i planned to run... so i decided to take wed n thurs off... and use medical check up as a reason... besides i havent went back home for nearly one month... and so off i went to the hospital kuala nerang on thurs... previously i went to court for 'angkat sumpah'.... at hospital, my aunt who worked as a nurse there helped me... the process was smooth and evrything was completed within 4 hours... instead of three days... then the last procedure is to see the doctor... once he took out my x-ray, he said there's something wrong with it.... i felt uneasy... so he asked me to take another x-ray just in case i didnt stand straight... but the result is still the same; my spine bend to right abit... and it look do obvious on the x-ray... and then he dropped the bombshell, he suspect that i have scoliosis @ S-spine... i was speechless... tears brimming my eyes... then he wrote a referral letter for me to go to the bones expert at HSB... man i was in shocked... and denial... i thought that i will be like one of my friend... went under knife and being out metal to support the spine... i dont want that... i cried as i walked out the hospital.. thinking that i need to drive, i called Su n talked to her... after i have calmed down, i drove back and pick her up at the bus stop... we talked and discussed about whether to tell my mom... that night i told her... she looked calm but noticing how worried i was, she gave encouragement to me, saying evrything will be fine... she told my siblings and they became nice to me... the next day, which is today... we went to a clinic in alor star... mom broought siti a day before to x-ray just in case she has the same thing as i do... and the doctor aske her to bring me to him... so we went... i was so worried the whole time... thinking whether its the end of my leisurely life... but as soon as the doctor looked at my x-ray, she just said ' x dak apa. ok ja. normal." i almost couldnt believe it... he looked so calm,,,, but he then added, he has been a doctor for 30over years... and he's seen a lot of cases like this, they just lead a normal life... nothing affect them... and there are cases where S is visible, yet the person has been working for many years and is almost retired... my mom was so happy, but i dont... honestly although he said that, in confident, i just cant seem to accept it entirely... but then, since my mom n dad felt that it is nothing, i guess i should believe them right? so there goes my worries for two days... and the doctor's comment tainted my med-checkup... damn him! buat rosak ja aku nyer report... huh! next time aku tarak buat dah aih kat sana...  anyway, apa yg aku nak bgtau, lainkali jgn la ada nawaitu yg salah mcm aku ni.. hanya kerana aku x confident dgn observation dr PPD or JPN, aku decide nak lari.. tgk, weekend aku sgt stress penuh dgn kerisauan.. buat susah hati aku ja... cis..